Thursday, April 23, 2009

lists of 7: ways to procrastinate

After a while, the Facebook/Myspace/news/Google Reader routine gets old. Everyone goes to sleep, no one posts any blogs, and you've read all the interesting news. And the non-interesting news, too. This leaves the procrastinators among us searching desperately for things to do.

And, according to some chick with a blog about um.. habits? I think? says there are two kinds of procrastination: active and passive. "Active means you go out and find a thing and then you do that thing in order to avoid DOING THE THING. Passive is when you let a thing fill your time/space/mind so you can avoid DOING THE THING." Reading Sharpie Chronicles is obviously active.

Luckily for all of you, I am, in fact, a master procrastinator. Let me share my wisdom with you.

Internet procrastination:
The best kind, duh.

1. Stumbleupon. This is #1 for a reason. Stumbleupon is like a news and image and other things dump, brought to your browser based on your interests with a click of a button. It's so. So. Addicting. You should download the toolbar, just to, you know, check it out. Research purposes.

2. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Game. It's a text-based game, which means it requires thinking, so you really can classify this as active procrastination! (Sorta.) It takes forever. And if you mess up, you have to start over. I used the hints and cheats, but Sh, don't tell anyone!

3. Plinky. They say they're a creativity site (or something) to give people ideas to post on their blogs. I've used it once or twice, but there's a lot of silliness and random stuff to make goofy answers too. Reading everyone else's answers is something else, too.

Non-internet procrastination!
'Cause the computer rots your brain, and you need to have some left for that essay.

4. Drink copious amounts of caffeine. You will not be able to focus on anything. Foosh's caffeine mints are my personal favorite. Then, get out Sharpies, tape, and white paper, tape them all together to cover your floor and make boxes and diagrams for where everything should go. Once that's done, go to your kitchen and label things like "Sink." "Fridge." "Light switch." In case people forget. You'll be doing your housemates a service.

5. Collect all the pens and pencils in the house and test each and every one of them. Have a funeral for the deceased ones, and hide the rest. Or you can sell them to your family and/or roommates if they want them back.

6. Update your blog template, if you have one. Either write your own (it takes soooo long), or do endless searches to find just the right one, then tweak it to look how you want it to look without ruining the entire template. If you are lame not lame and have Wordpress, um... create a Blogger blog or something.

7. Make a List of 7.
Of anything. Then trackback it here so I can read it and be proud.

photo "too much caffeine" courtesy of Saul Zackson

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who i am!

Tiph used to be this weird hippie chick who sewed things and drank tea and rode bikes and wrote silly things. Then, college came along, and now she's this weird hippie chick with math in her brain and notebooks full of indefinite integrals. And hardly any time to write. This is her space. Thankfully, space is a vacuum and any complaints you may have cannot be heard.

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